On Ambition

I have no idea what innately drives some people. I only know that I am a pretty competitive person by nature and that has translated to some pretty crazy ambitions over my life-time.

Crazy ambitions that I really won't go into (if only because by calling them "crazy" I pretty much admitted that I didn't achieve any of the things that I aimed for).

But I must have been completely freaking insane to think that I could start my first career in a foreign country. As if a legal career in BigLaw isn't difficult enough, I decided I needed the extra challenge of attempting it with the handicap of not being a native speaker of the language that the legal work needs to be done in. Oh, but barely 6 months ago, while I waited for my job's start date to arrive, I was absolutely freaking convinced that I could survive (even thrive!) in China.

Yeah. No.

But you, the reader, will doubtlessly say: "But plenty of other people have thrived overseas working in a job that required them to operate in a language they were not comfortable in!" And you'd be right, except, I may not (or may?) be one those people.

The me of 2 or 3 years ago would have definitely sucked it up and pushed on through (if only for pride's sake). I'm not so sure about the me of today.